Finding Home
by captainswanseven
Summary: Missing scenes from 6x04. A look into Killian's feelings on moving in with Emma.


**Author's Note:** **The references to Killian's mother are connected to the story of Killian's parents that I am telling in the universe of my Alternative S7 CS Fic, but they also work as a stand-alone.**

 **~.~**

Moving in.

Killian had been waiting for this moment for quite some time, but now that it was here, it still felt a little surreal. He had never thought this was something in the cards for him. He had never thought that, one day, he would be excited to leave the Jolly Roger and settle on land to share his life with his one True Love. It was everything he could have hoped for: he would be sharing a home with Emma while getting to keep his ship.

Not so bad for a pirate.

With a beaming grin on his face, his eyes wandered across his quarters until they landed on the open chest that he had been filling with his most precious possessions. Recognition dawned on his face when he spotted a rusty, metal chain spread over one of his vests. He lingered a moment before taking a step forward and letting his fingers trace over its rough edges. His lips quivered slightly as he pulled the chain from the chest's confines, the round and small object dangling from the chain. It had been years since he had last seen it.

 _Killian and Liam followed_ The Jewel of the Realm _'s Naval Captain, marveled at the vessel's beauty. It didn't even seem real that only hours ago they had been fighting for their lives aboard Captain Silver's ship._

 _"These are your quarters from now on, sailors," the officer announced, opening one of the wooden doors and inviting them in._

 _Liam pushed a dumbfounded Killian inside the room. "My brother and I can't thank you enough. It's an honor to be part of your virtuous crew, Sir."_

 _"It's the least I could do for the heroes who have found the Eye of the Storm," the Captain stated, his warm words contrasting with Silver's cruel ways. "Welcome to the Royal Navy, Officers Jones."_

 _"I still can't believe it," Killian's voice was barely a whisper, his eyes regaled by the refinement and elegance of their quarters. It was the first thing he was able to say after the Captain had left. "Thank you, Liam."_

 _Killian frowned when Liam's only response was a dry smile and weary eyes fixed on the floor as if in shame. Perhaps that was a result of Liam's usual humbleness and his insistence on not taking full credit for his heroic finding. "What matters is we are finally free."_

 _Killian stood there speechless, watching his brother open the bed drawers and pull out some clean clothes. "Are you even aware of what this means? You made our dreams come true, brother."_

 _At Killian's words, Liam's demeanor seemed to change, a happy and relieved smile forming on his lips. "You're right." Liam's eyes traveled to the satchel he had dropped on the table and then traveled back to Killian. "I think it's time to show you something."_

 _"What?" Killian brushed a wet strand of hair from out of his face as he watched Liam fumbling through his satchel until he pulled out a beautiful brass compass. Liam held it by its gleaming metal chain, the small compass swinging in front of Killian's astounded eyes. "It's a marvel."_

 _"This compass belonged to our mother," Liam let it rest on Killian's palm. "I know you have no memories of her, but I remember her saying that this had been a gift from her mother, for her to always be able to find her way home."_

 _"Why show it to me now?"_

 _"Because now…" Liam retrieved the compass from Killian's grasp and set it on the bedside table, in glorious view, "we have finally found home."_

The corners of Killian's eyes crinkled with a fond smile as he carefully put the compass back in the chest. He now knew why Liam had never appeared to be as happy as he was during their first days as Royal Navy officers – the guilt of what he had done to Silver and his crew getting the best of him – but not even that could erase the loving memories of their shared moments during that time. He missed his dear brother, but at least now he could find solace in the fact that Liam had moved on and was finally at peace. In his own way, he had found home again.

* * *

What was supposed to be the calm, peaceful day in which he would be moving in with Emma had turned sour very quickly. First the crocodile had trapped Belle in the Jolly Roger and Killian had had no other option but to stay with her, lest the demon return and do something to her. Then he had left to help Emma find the Evil Queen, only for him to end up returning in order to save Belle from the evil scientist.

Images of the harpoon piercing Jekyll's chest haunted Killian as he attempted to clean the blood out of the blade, but no matter how much he scrubbed, he couldn't get rid of the stain. He kept rubbing as hard as he could until he didn't know anymore what he was trying to get rid of: the blood or his own guilt. It had been a while since he had killed someone. Back then it was easier to ignore the blame sitting on his chest, pretending to be a heartless pirate who only cared about himself.

But not now.

Now he was a better man and he couldn't simply ignore the familiar heaviness in his heart for having taken a life. He scrubbed the blade once again, more harshly this time, and when the drops of blood refused to leave, he let his temper get the best of him and threw the harpoon away. A loud thud of the metal landing on the deck echoed in the wind and almost tore a hole in one of the deck tiles.

"Whoa, maybe we should buy some carpets for the house," Emma's eyes were on the fallen harpoon, but her voice was playful, letting him know that she had witnessed it all. When she realized her attempt at lighting the mood hadn't worked, she walked towards him and rubbed his arm gently. "Hey, it's not your fault."

His Swan always seemed to know when he was about to let guilt take him down the old familiar path of self-loathing.

"I still didn't have to kill him, Swan."

"It was self-defense. Jekyll tried to kill you and Belle," her affectionate and comforting words never failed to lift his spirits. "That doesn't make you any less of a hero."

"Aye, I just don't appreciate the memories it evokes," he admitted, feeling her curl her fingers around his hook. She gave him a knowing look, the one she always gave him when the ghosts from the past came back to haunt him. The one silently reminding him that he was worthy of happiness. The one that always seemed to be the push he needed to feel better in moments like these. "But if there is one thing I've learnt from coming back from the dead is that I will not let my past determine my future."

Emma's mouth curved into a smile, proud of him. She knew better than anyone that Killian would keep thinking about this for some time to come – guilt never went away that easily – but his determination to make peace with it was a step in the right direction. At least for now.

"There's my pirate," she took a step forward and wrapped her arms around his neck before dropping a quick kiss on his lips. "Want to get out of here?"

There was nothing he wanted more.

* * *

When they walked past the white fenced gate, Killian dropped his chest on the lawn. He would be needing his hand and hook to be free for what he wanted to do next.

"What's wrong?" Emma's frown turned into a smile and then she burst out laughing when he confidently swept her off her feet and carried her through the front door.

"We're going to do this the right way, love," there was a mix of excitement and impatience in his voice, but when he tried to push the door button with his elbow, nothing happened. He cursed amidst Emma's laughter. His romantic gesture had been sabotaged by a locked door. Not wanting to spoil his movie-like moment any longer, Emma flicked her wrist, opening the door with her magic. "Aye, much better."

Killian wasted no time and made his way to the stairs, knowing very well her bedroom was on the upper floor. _Their_ bedroom now.

"Do you like it?" Emma asked once they got there and he placed her on her feet. "You can change whatever you want. This is your-"

His lips were on hers before she had a chance to finish, nibbling a trail from her mouth to the soft shell of her ear.

"It's perfect, Swan," he whispered, feeling her shiver under his warm breath. They stood there for a moment, just staring into each other's eyes and reveling in the feeling of finally moving in together. Of finally having a house they could call their own.

"There's only one thing missing," Emma said in her flirtiest voice and then his chest magically appeared on the bed. He smiled at her – of course his Swan would go out of her way to truly make him feel that now this was his home too.

"I want to show you something," he took her hand in his and pulled her towards the bed. Images of that one time she had given him the honor to show him her personal belongings came to his mind. He had no charming pair of old glasses to entertain her with, but much like her, he had never shown any of the chest's contents to anyone before. Not even Milah.

Emma squeezed his shoulder when he didn't hesitate in opening the chest, telling him without words that she knew how much this moment meant to him. Meant to her.

He pulled some of his clothes out of the way until he finally found what he was looking for. He stretched his hand to her, her eyes settling on the small compass on his palm.

"This belonged to my mother. It was a gift from my grandmother, actually… so she could always find her way home. Liam and I used to have it over the bedside table in our quarters. After years of torment, we had finally found home," his voice was soft, nostalgic even. "When he died, I put it away." There had been no point in having it there. It would never be home without him.

Knowing how much of a sensitive moment this was for Killian, Emma rubbed his back, attempting to comfort him. She sensed that was all she could do while he reminisced about the past.

Killian kept quiet for an instant, staring at the compass in his hand and squeezing it before his eyes locked on hers. "It may not have been this one, but a compass led me to you. I've lived far too long to know that didn't happen by chance."

A small smile graced her lips at his reference of the magical compass that had brought them together. There were these little things - coincidences or whatever you'd wish to call it – that were part of their journeys that made it seem like they were fated to meet and find each other.

Emma ran her hand down his arm until her fingers covered the compass in his hand. "Can I?"

Killian parted his lips when Emma took the compass from him, watching her with expectant eyes as she walked away from him. And then she did it. She did the one thing that made him fall in love with her all over again: she carefully set the compass on the bedside table in full view, just as it did all those years ago, glorious and holding centuries of tales. He had brought it with him hoping to do that, but it seemed that he was also an open book for his Swan.

Emma then reached for his arm, pulling his body to hers before she nuzzled her nose against his. "Welcome home."


End file.
